I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
