Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Randomize
