and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
