Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
my liver is dry heaving
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
