I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
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