During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
