I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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