She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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