Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
