i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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