My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
