Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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