it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
