they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
