my vag is so smooth its legendary
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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