Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
