I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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