none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
