I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My day in three words: secret purse cake
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
