I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
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