I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
