i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
