What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i dont even know how to be here
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
