Its about making memories worth repressing
We got so high we made milksteak
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
