Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
