We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
