If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
