so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
