I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
