If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
