All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
