4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
