ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I think my moral compass just broke
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