office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
