We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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