porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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