THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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