We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
