my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize