did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
