Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
