I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
