I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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