that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
God, I missed his penis.
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