i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
