This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
