In the future we'll all be gay
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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