when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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