so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
