MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
